It Could Have Been Better, it Could Have Been Worse

Yesterday I went to the US Consulate in Sydney. I was not immediately denied a US Visa, but I wasn't approved one either. I have to got to a panel physician for a physical because my offense was less than 5 years ago. Thankfully, they have a panel physician in Brisbane. I called yesterday and made an appointment for today (which, I again have to pay for out of pocket). I also decided to go for a 5 year visa and pay the less than $30 fee, rather than opting for the free 1 year visa. I don't know if we'll travel again in the next 5 years... but a $30 insurance against the hundreds of dollars the process has cost me this time.... worth it! The guy at the consulate indicated that I have a very good chance of having my health (and visa) approved given my otherwise clean record.

Hopefully today's appointment will be fairly straight forward, and I'll be able to get a visa.

I also went to a corset shop in Sydney while I was there. It was somewhat odd. I called and emailed last week to make sure they would have the corsets I wanted to try on in stock. I got a response of "Yes, they are." But they weren't. I did get to try on one that was kind of similar... and one that fit around the body, and one that fit in the bust, but not one that was similar, that fit my bust and body... Given the slim pickings everywhere else though, I did order (a pretty much custom) one.

With any luck, it will be delivered to me late next week, and it will fit.

So, it was a positive day, but I did not get the task complete feeling that I was looking for. Life is never dull, and I don't think I want it to be either.



The most amazing part of my day was watching the sun rise at the airport, and the cliché clouds below and sun above views out of the plane window as I flew to Sydney. They were truly stunning and wonderfully peaceful sights, which made me very happy to feel alive and see the beauty in amongst the stress I'm feeling. I wish I could describe what I saw and do it justice. I might have to try.

The Never Ending Lists

Lists are starting to move beyond being "good" to being "necessary".

Lists help me sleep at night. I write down what I need to do, see, talk about, look at, re-think. Then when I climb into bed at night, my heads slows down surprisingly quickly, and I fall asleep - though it might also have something to do with the near constant state of tiredness that I'm in too...

I put more stock in the lists than the tiredness, having had my share of insomnia moments.

BabyCakes and I seem to be spending surprisingly small abouts of time together, due to our diverse schedules. The time we do spend together we cling to, sometimes making parting very hard. I think we are both longing for our honeymoon holiday, and having a chance to just be us for a while.

The play is progressing well. As with most rehearsal schedules, now is the time when people don't really want to be there, but when they need to be there (myself included). We're dangerously close to the tech and dress rehearsals, and I feel under-prepared. I have deliberately stepped away from a lot of the organisational aspects both because I don't have time, and because I don't want to step on the Stage Manager's toes. Unfortunately, I've just discovered that the SM has never SMed before, and it shows in her confidence level, and her understanding of her role. I might need to have a quiet sit down with her and give some advice.


Tomorrow I go to Sydney and the US Consulate. I'm nervous as heck too. I know it shouldn't be a big problem, but it is off putting. I'll be glad to have tomorrow over and done with, be back at home and a lot more settled. Hopefully I'll also have a corset for under the big white dress too - that's been a stumbling block, given it is a FOUNDATION garment, so far I've not had the foundation required for building the rest of the garment! Before the corset aficionados out there get too carried away - the corset will be more of a girdle than a classic corset... I need a 50s look more than I need a new toy.

We're moving into the stage of organisation for the wedding where people are wanting their money... it is very nerve wracking to see so much money going out, with the money coming in not even close to matching it! Don't get me wrong, we've saved up to money to be spent.. but I don't like seeing so much go out when it has taken so long to save it! I guess that will probably stand me in good stead to save up for the next project and the next...

Drink and Drive, and it Can Haunt You Forever

......and you don't have to hurt yourself or others for it to haunt you.



I was really happy to read this news story on news.com.au . Fosters have decided to drop their super high alcohol and guarana/taurine/caffeine fortified drinks. I'm not a wowser, but I'm really glad that one of the brewers has stepped up to take this one on. Printing "Drink responsibly" (in minute lettering) on the side of the single serve sized bottle with two and a half to three standard drinks in it does not end the social responsibility of these corporate giants.

I've been rethinking my relationship to alcohol a lot in recent times, triggered by the diet, general health consciousness, and the ever present "getting older" type thoughts, especially the morning after - the hangovers are getting much harder to deal with!

Socially, responsible drinking is not cool in Australia. If I stopped drinking at my second glass of wine (the healthy daily intake), I'd be pooh-poohed and made to feel like I was a party pooper, or a control freak.

We have a culture that tends to define being laid back with drinking until one's personality is altered in some way. Having a "couple of drinks" is rarely two drinks, it tends to be closer to four or five. For a woman, four drinks is a binge by health standards - that doesn't leave much room for a healthy level of drinking and socialising by Australian social standards.

That's not to say that I've stopped drinking, or that I only have two drinks at a time. I still get hangovers, but I'm aware of the toll they are taking, and I'm thinking in a much more holistic way these days.



I've been having a very stressful time trying to finalise our honeymoon plans.

We just made our final payment on our flights and cruise, when I innocently said "Just confirming we don't need visas, right?" to which was replied "Not unless you have a police record." Cue the drink driving charge rearing its ugly head once more.

I've had to disclose it to my insurance company, when I applied for a mortgage, advise it to the Blue Card authorities, and now, it could prevent me from going on the magnificent honeymoon we planned.

Thankfully, after a lot of research, and a few tears too, I've worked out that I *am* allowed to enter Canada, but only because my crime was not a crime in Canada (their drink driving limit is 0.08%, and my offense was under that) - if I had broken their laws, I would not be allowed in. Full stop. That's it. Five years after the completion of my penalty I could apply to be recognised as rehabilitated, but that process also takes time, and I'd have to demonstrate that I was in fact rehabilitated, and unlikely to re-offend.

The US Consulate has a different set of rules, which while not as black and white in their process, offers the perception of the potential for more discretion, and are far more rigid in the application of the rules. In short, Canada publish their rules, if you are inside of them, you're good to go, if you aren't, you aren't. The US doesn't publish the rules, and you have to apply in each individual case to see what they say. (There are big warnings though, that they don't like drug convictions, or convictions for terrorism ... ... ...) To make things even more involved, there is no consulate in Brisbane, so I have to go to Sydney, because one must personally attend the application interview. The free visa is also accompanied by all kinds of application fees and lodging fees and stuff. I'm hoping, that once again, given I did not break the American law, that I have a good chance I will get the visa, I'm especially hoping I get the visa seeing as though we've just finished PAYING for the trip... which of course, you should never do, until you have all your visas!

Live and learn. I'm just glad we aren't trying to go somewhere where they don't have alcohol in their culture!

I'm guessing, just like the conviction, this is the sort of hassle I have ahead of me for the rest of my life, every time I wish to travel. Fun hey?


Let me learn the lesson for you.

Don't drive home if you've had a few drinks.

I wasn't panicked as I drove up to the breath test - I wasn't drunk, I thought. I was curious to see what my percentage was. I was wrong. legally, I was drunk. It is my price to pay, I accept that, I broke the law.

I Love

I am a lucky person.


I have so many people that I love, truly and honestly love.


Thank you to each and every one of you.


Today was not an easy day, and it was harder for some of my loved ones.

Thinking of you and sending my love.

Time Ticks Away

Thank you Jigger for my title today.

Life is busy. The wedding is now just 54 days away, not that I'm specifically counting... "less than 8 weeks" is daunting enough for me, but the software I use does count, and it does come in handy. As expected at the 54 day mark, the wedding has become a very big focus and I spent last week compiling invitations, guest lists, updating addresses and putting together wedding favours. This week turns the immediate focus to table centre pieces and place cards, as well as many other loose ends that need tying and the continual budget wrangling.

I've also started rehearsals for "The Truth", another Pratchett inspired production being performed at the Brisbane Arts Theatre. As advertising materials are made available, I'll share dates and times and the like with everyone. The production is already shaping up to be a funny and rewarding experience, which is always handy when one has to juggle so hard to fit all the rehearsals in. This time round I've declined to Stage Manage, and am instead focusing on Assistant Directing, which is kinda fun, because it very much feels like an "all-care-no-responsibility" kind of role... there is responsibility of course, but not to the same degree a Director or Stage Manager needs. It is more of a fun than daunting role!

I've also been working half a day a fortnight doing a newsletter for BabyCakes' work, which has given us a bit more time together, rather than less, because I head into the showroom and work on a Saturday morning to coincide with when he has to be there to sell. It has been interesting so far, and the extra money is always handy.

With all these tasks and responsibilities, BabyCakes and I have seen each other in rather small bursts of togetherness, but it is all for a purpose so it is manageable. I can say without a shadow of a doubt, the honeymoon will be very nice to have some quality time together, while seeing some amazing sights.

The rain we've had has been welcome, but it is encouraging all the stuff we cut back in the garden to re-grow, so I'll have to find some time to wrestle them back into the shape we want!


BabyCakes and I have continued on the CSIRO Total Wellbeing Diet (albeit with some aberrations on occasion), but even with the blips, I was delighted to step onto the scales yesterday and find that I'd lost about 4.7 kgs in about 2-3 weeks, despite the tape measure not showing much change in that time. Mostly, we are both happy and healthy, and finding it relatively easy to make better choices when we do stray, and being more aware of what we have to do to make up for it. I feel happy about where we are, and where we are going.

I'd best be off now to get my candles out of the oven.....

Vale Simon The Carpet Layer

I was in the midst of writing a post when BabyCakes called.

He had just spoken with police as one of his sub-contracted staff was found dead on a building site this morning. He had been working alone on site yesterday.

BabyCakes' mobile number was one of a very few phone numbers stored in the man's new phone, and BabyCakes was one of the last people to recieve a call from him.



I met him once, he seemed like a nice man. My thoughts are with his family, and his fiancée, whom he was due to marry in two weeks time, and the young man who discovered his body when innocently starting his Monday morning at work.

What a sad and terrible thing to happen. Part of life, yes, but shocking nonetheless.

A Match Well Made

At about the same time as we moved into our house, a collegue of BabyCake's put his 4 bedroom house in the suburbs on the market and moved into a one bedroom inner city unit. This worked well for us, as we managed to buy all kinds of stuff from them at well below replacement cost - mostly tools.

It took a while, but the weekend before last, the pick up was effected and in the space of hours we had a beer fridge, lawn mower, more power tools than you can poke a stick at, spades, loppers, assorted hardware, an extra work bench, ladder and more. Given our exciting new (to us) toys, we planned a day in the garden for Sunday. Then it rained. Yesterday, however, it did not rain, and we had a huge day in the garden.

The pictures are some examples of what a couple of people with lopping tools (and an overgrown garden) can do in a few hours...

We have had a lot of fun making decisions about what happens in our garden, confident that we get the final say for everything we do - very cool after years of shared spaces and rental gardens where we've had to deal with other people's poor choices... now we can make our own poor choices! All with the added bonus of being physical movement, and a profitable way to get a sweat happening!

Some People are Scary!

I found this story today, and I'm glad I did.

I feel so balanced and sane.

The wedding is important to me to SHARE the day with my friends and loved ones, not to suject them to it!

As a bridesmaid I wouldn't sign an agreement like that if I were asked to sign one. Talk about people being the ultimate accessory!

Retraining....

BabyCakes and I started on the CSIRO Total Wellbeing Diet on Monday. The first thing that hits you as you prepare to start (by going shopping), is how much food there is... It is hard to believe that one could feel hungry by following their plan - but I do. I think it is because I've been very carbohydrate heavy in my eating style in recent years and this is a low carb, low fat, high protein eating plan. I try to balance the occasional hunger pangs with drinking more water, and keep in the forefront of my mind not only my goals, but that it will take time to retrain my body as to what is enough food. BabyCakes is finding it pretty easy to cope with, and is only hungry in the lead up to dinner time.

What am absolutely excited about is the fact that the meal plan has been designed so as to include all one's vitamin and mineral needs without the need for supplements. It is nice to be able to think that I do not have to cringe every time one of those two-and-five ads come on TV, each time I hear another thing added to the seemingly endless list of things one *must* do each day to remain healthy/sane/whatever. I can be confident that some scientists have done my thinking for me on that front!

BabyCakes' dog also moved in on Monday (which was not especially coincidental), and he keeps us honest in so far as our 20 minute daily walk, to be ramped up as we all loose a bit of spare tyre.

We had a lovely gentleman named Mark build the last required fence for us which enabled the transfer of Dog to his new home. Dog was very disoriented on Monday eve, having only had one home since the pet shop, but seemingly is much more confident of his place as the time goes on. We also decided to try and create the illusion of more height on a worryingly low fence, and created with our own gloved hands and chicken wire and star picket height extension which seems to be doing its job thus far. I have to plant the passion fruit vines (one each of black fruit, yellow fruit and red fruit) once we get a shovel, to beautify and bountify it!




On Sunday evening we had a delightful dinner with BabyCake's parents and aunt. The roast lamb (those Australia Day ads work) was very tasty, the conversation was interesting



Saturday saw us put our wedding bands on lay by (mostly so they can store them in their safe, and we don't have to worry about them at home)... another tantalizing step closer to finalising all our plans.




I Intended to write more on this post... but got sidetracked, so shall post what I have anyway....

Returning From the Hunt - Girl Style

Today I had a lovely day. I met up with My step Mum, two bridesmaids, sister in law and niece and spent a good part of the day in the city.

We met up to discuss the plans and needs of the impending wedding day and I thought to start the process of trying to find frocks for the bridesmaids. As it turned out, I showed them a picture I'd pulled from a magazine of a pretty frock. All thought it looked pretty - and well priced. We found the store and discovered the dress, on a sale rack no less! The girls tried them on, they fitted, they looked good, they were bought. All before lunch!!

We had lunch and I reeled off where the plans were at. Questions were asked from all angles. After lunch we moved on to a hunt for accessories. We found necklaces and earrings that worked for everyone. The hunt then stalled somewhat, but was still fun. We looked for gloves but didn't find any - we found a whole heap of hats to try on, which was enjoyed by everyone - little-miss-almost-two joined in with the hats she could reach and posed happily when the mirror was placed at her level - she also loved the shoe stores! She had a very cute mini purse bought for her, and toted that about for the rest of the day, having to stop alternately to put her new bracelet in the bag, and take it out again.

I'm so glad we managed to find dresses with the minimum of fuss!


BabyCakes is yet to return from Big Day Out, so I'm having a very restful night in this evening.

Wedding Minus Fifteen Weeks

How scary does that heading look? I can also tell you that it is 105 days away - and that's not because I counted, but because a piece of wedding planning software I have tells me.

This week I've really kicked back into thinking about wedding plans. I've ordered favor components, new return address labels (that's what a move does for you!), spoken to the dress maker, revisited the budget and guest list, confirmed the ceremony location, spoken to a chair supplier for the ceremony, and tomorrow I'm meeting up with most of the women who will be involved in the wedding to have a catch up, girlie day and planning session. I've decided to start BabyCakes and myself on the CSIRO Wellbeing Diet. It looks like a lifestyle option and is specifically balanced to ensure all daily guidelines are met... and comes with shopping lists too - how cool is that?

I've also taken to writing lots of lists. Having said all that, it doesn't particularly stress me. I keep wondering what I've not thought about that I need/want, and most of it is organised. Most of it is able to be organised and most of it is affordable. I'm glad that I have relatively simple tastes and sense of balance. I can see how easily everything could get out of hand if one was remotely extravagant.

Mostly, I'm glad to hear the reports of relatives buying their airfares. That makes everything that much more real. I'm really looking forward to seeing everyone, all together. It doesn't happen often.

I'm looking forward to the dress being made, that will be exciting - it's the first time I've had clothing custom made for me, and the more I go shopping, the more I'm glad I found a reasonable dressmaker, because off the rack just doesn't fit me at the moment (big boobs are not the joy most people expect them to be).



I'm getting married... and I'm looking forward to it!

And I thought I Was Odd...

Biting the Facebook Bullet - Where it Leads

I resisted the Facebook monster for quite a while. On Christmas Eve I finally succumbed and created an account. Almost straight away I was drawn to the potential for linking in with my geographically diverse family.

Most of my Facebook "friends" are related to me, and it has been a lovely informal way to keep in contact with people, some of whom I would have met only a handful of times in my life.

I also managed to locate a school friend with whom I'd fallen out of contact with which was reason enough to join for me.

I must say that I've had fun with a lot of the games and applications that one tends to join up to willy-nilly in the initial euphoria of learning how it all works.

One that stood out for me as an application that helps identify family and create a family tree. I was however concerned about the potential for public access to it and the information it contains.

This is not the first time the lure of understanding and tracking family history through a computerised form has inspired me, but the last time (maybe 10 years ago), the software was not quite as sophisticated as I needed for my large and somewhat confusing family.

Today I revisited my search for a piece of family tree type software, looking for something that was (at least initially) free but sophisticated enough to cope with the gnarled and twisted family tree that is mine (the ability to assign more than one family/parent etc.).

I think I have found just such a piece of software.

I have inputted the 30 or so people that make up my only-just-extended family (siblings, parents, partners and children), and it seems to be coping fabulously. I also found a review that places it top pick of genealogy software, which is pretty cool, given that I already started using that one!

I think I'd like to do some more to follow the tendrils of all the tree, to learn about how easy it is to become interlinked with so many people. I know my Dad's uncle has done a lot to trace their family line, and I'd like to be able to digitise it help future generations search it and understand it more easily.

Mostly, I would like to know more about the people around me.

Making Merry

We've had a lovely Christmas.

Christmas eve saw us celebrating at an impromptu dinner with friends, thankfully for us, they too live on the the north side, so the drive home was pretty easy.

I woke up quite late, and we exchanged gifts before we headed out. I got a gardening through the year book, a month by month guide to what one needs to attend to in the garden. I'm such a novice at it all that I need the help! I also got a paper shredder.... there is not much scrap paper in our house that has not been shredded now! Gadgets are cool! I also expect that the shredded paper will be good for composting too. BabyCakes seems pretty happy with his home brew kit from brewcraft. It came complete with a bench top capper and a book explaining all the intricacies of beer making.


We opened up presents with my side of the family on Christmas morning, with a few families having to head off to have lunch with their other halves. We stayed and had lunch with my folks. It's odd to think that lunch for 11 is a small affair.... but it is!

After lunch we headed home for a bit, before going to BabyCakes' parents for dinner. More food was eaten and more good times were had. It was a low key day, and nicely balanced to minimise stress.

Yesterday we went to Bunnings and spent some vouchers we'd been given to buy some fencing materials and plants. We told a few people that we would be home on Boxing day and that they were welcome to drop in. Rastas and the Primrose Goddess were the only ones who took up our offer, and we shared dinner and chatted into the evening. The Primrose Goddess had a chance to look around the garden in daylight during this visit, and she helped identify some of the plants we have, and which ones might be best if removed - most of which I'd already decided were weeds for me.

Overdue

Hiya,

It has been too long since I last posted. Sometimes the more I looked at how long between posts it had been, the less I wanted to post, or the more embarrassed about posting I became.

So I decided I should just post and move on!


We're settling into our home pretty well. We enjoy living here, and now that we have all our services connected (and the bills rolling in), it feels much more relaxing.

The silly season has created some busy times for us, and I must say, I'm looking forward to spending some quiet time at home with BabyCakes without feeling like we should be somewhere else, which I hope will happen in the time off after Christmas.


We've decided that we will be at home on Boxing day, and will welcome drop-ins from those that are looking for something to do/somewhere to go/someone to see. We're also going to be home for New Years Eve, and might even look at doing another spit roast if people are interested.

Lots is happening everywhere, and now that I've ended my shameful break from posting, I will endeavour to share some of our news in the near future.

Post 100! - A Phone, a Phone, My Kingdom.... Ahh Whatever!

As you know, our phone was supposed to be connected on Friday.







I've since worked out, that that was very optimistic.

Think about the joys one can have with dealing with Telstra.... well, I'm dealing with a CUSTOMER of Telstra... that's two who layers of bureaucracy before one even works one's way through the departmental minefields!

I'm not even going to start trying to log how long phonecalls to the phone company take, the crappy mobile reception at our new house and the hidden "joys" of pre-paid phones.


On Monday I received a text to tell me the phone was connected. I was excited, but not so excited as to start giving out the number to anyone but BabyCakes.

After a full day at work (yeah, how often does *that* happen?), going straight to the flat to clean it, hiring a carpet cleaner, returning to the flat to steam clean carpets, and finally getting home at 9:15pm, I excitedly plug in a phone to each of the 5, yes, f i v e phone points in the house searching for a dial tone......

.....to find none had one.


I swore. I went to bed.


Yesterday, another phonecall was made from work (I know, two days in a row at work - amazing..... and likely to be more - all week in fact - who woulda thunk?), and now we have a fault lodged. Hopefully, sometime in the next couple of days someone might be able to make it so a phone rings in our house...

The upside is, that whilst the phone is officially connected, they can provision the dsl to the line... so once we have a phone, we're likely to have our internet back too!


Anyway, back to work....

Still Alive.

Howdy!

Just a quick note to let you know that we're still alive. We've been busy moving between the flat and the house, and a large proportion of the move has happened.

The big stuff (fridge, sofa, book cases, and other stuff) will be moved on Saturday. Mail redirection, telephone connection and cable connection happens tomorrow, with the ADSL being provisioned sometime after that.

We're enjoying the new house, the cat a little less so - but she's always been a bit skittish. She is definitely settling into the swing of things and is more and more curious about what is on the other side of the doors and windows.

We're looking forward to having the fridge in the same venue as the bed, and being able to shut the door on the flat and not have to come back.

All part of the process I guess!


I'm going to pack my computer now - so I'll see you on the flip side!

Why Doesn't Everyone Understand How Important Today Is?

The managing agent told us weeks ago that she'd booked in to do the post tenant inspection first thing this morning, which was great, because it meant that we expected to be able to get into our house by about lunchtime.

At about 1pm BabyCakes range the agent to find out what's happening, and she said that she was planning to leave the office soon, and then had to do a report and that maybe by about 3pm she *might* be in a spot to give us our keys (ok, maybe she didn't quite word it like that, but it feels like it).

So, I'm home from work, and going stir crazy, I just want to start moving some of the mountains of boxes.

*whinge*



Thanks Rastas for your comment this morning on my last post... it made me smile!

3 More Sleeps!

....until we can use our new keys. The girl downstairs is playing loud music till all hours, the trains are getting noisier (I swear they are!), and we just want to move on with our lives. We're a bit excited that on Monday afternoon we can enter our new home :)

For The Wah...