Ikea Furniture, Babies, Cars, Mobile Phones, eBay, Photographers and Dressmakers

Life has been busy. I shall endeavor to explain my title further....

Ikea Furniture
BabyCakes and I assembled flat pack furniture together - it MUST be love.... no one lost a finger, or even better, dignity (mind you BabyCakes did look on in wonder as I pulled out the instructions to read).

Our Ikea visit started (relatively) innocently enough one Sunday afternoon (imminent tax cheque burning a hole in our pocket given our constant saving-for-the-wedding/honeymoon focus) , with the purchase of some new bedroom furniture. Then my infatuation hit its first test of commitment - one box of flat pack furniture that had lovingly been wrestled in an out of the car was less than perfect - the pieces were damaged!

We assembled what we could (that which wasn't broken), and marveled at not only our skill in putting the furniture together, but our excellent design choices and late change in colour, whilst studiously ignoring the poor left over box of chest of drawers, to be swapped at a later date. The following Thursday we loaded up the Triton with the mangled box of Ikea parts, and headed back to Mecca, I mean Ikea. The return process at Ikea at 8pm on a Thursday night was surprisingly easy... they looked at the poor box of unwanted Ikea, didn't give us a hard time about the ripped box we returned it in (who worries about how the box gets opened when one is planning to keep what is inside??), or our desire not to just replace the pieces that were obviously damaged, but to get a whole new box and start over.

They credited the money spent back onto a "refund card" which was pretty cool, because as BabyCakes pointed out, it was a bit like spending money all over again.... We picked out a replacement, paid for it with our returns card and headed home.... I even waited 'till Friday to put it together and complete our bedroom furniture escapade...

Then BabyCakes' Mum wanted to get us our engagement gift, now that she's feeling much better and stronger. So, that Sunday we dutifully went back to Ikea and picked out our dining room table... and some chairs to match. The table is something we plan to keep for quite some time, deliberately buying an extension table to help us out with that goal. Thank you Mr & Mrs BabyCakes for our fantastic new table!

The table was exceptionally heavy, but very easy to put together - just add legs! The chairs however were a different story... once we worked out what the instructions meant it did go a lot more smoothly, but they were definitely the biggest challenge to motor skills that we have bought from Ikea so far!

They only had two chairs left on their shelves late in their Sunday... so guess what? We have to go back to Ikea again!!!

We also left BabyCake's Mum with a fist full of brochures for wall units for her lounge room (she likes Ikea almost as much as I do!), and I'm sure that we could be called on to help once she's made her decisions for that too.

Babies

In amongst all the Ikea visits life did actually keep moving, and BabyCake's cousin and his wife had a very cute baby girl on Sunday evening in Cairns. Baby Chloe was 5 pound 13 ounces when she was born (we'll call that 2.64 in metric terms). Mother and baby are doing well by all reports, proud Dad has sent through several pictures of their little bundle, with huge smiles all round.

My brother and his fiancée have moved past their due date on Sunday and are waiting on tenterhooks for the arrival of their first child too. Good luck guys! They also both started up blogs to document their journey (and have a place to write it down once and refer everybody to it...) Their Journals are now added to my list of blogs I read, check them out if you are interested!

We also found out that BabyCakes' sister is expecting, congratulations Nin, not only on the great news, but for winning the family baby race!


Cars
The Last Sunday in July sees the Queensland Chevrolet Car Club at their annual show and shine at Eight Mile Plains State School. Ordinarily, this event would not be top of my "things to do" list, but planning a wedding does strange things to you.... We saw a really cool car at the Hotrod show in at the RNA show grounds earlier this year, and we were hoping to see it again at this event. We did, and we finally got a chance to meet the owners of the stunning vehicle. This time round we were also able to get a bit closer up and fully appreciate what a beautiful car this 57 Chevy is. They have agreed to pencil in our wedding date and were very glad to hear that we had such strong feelings for their car. We haven't talked prices yet, but have swapped details, and acknowledged a definite intent! Yay! Now we just have to make some decisions about what the rest of of bridal party are traveling in!

(We've organised the bright purple car for the wedding, the other pics are cars I thought were cool)


Mobile Phones
We went and saw The Simpsons Movie. It was fun, just like a giant Simpsons episode in Cinemascope. The weird thing is, that the pre-show advertising caught me... Subsequently, BabyCakes bought me a very cool and very small limited edition Simpsons phone... It's bright yellow! It also has some of those wizz bang new fangled gadgets like a camera and polyphonic ring tones on it. (That's how up to date I am!). As I write this my phone number should have finished porting, in fact I literally got the text to confirm this as I was typing - spoOoOoky! So, I have now changed from Vodafone to Optus, not because I was in anyway unhappy with my Vodafone, but because the phone is locked to Optus for a bit, so it seemed easiest (and cheapest) to swap, at least for a while. Those of you on Vodafone, you will have to start paying for your calls to me, and those of you on Optus, you might get free calls to me... Mostly though.... how cool/cute is my phone??!!

You will be glad to know that even a Simpsons tragic like myself declined to stick the Homer "flasher" on my phone... it is a doo-hickey that flashes when one's phone rings... sad that THAT is the market that the advertising was aimed at, and I bought it.

Now I just have to keep plodding along with the arduous task of manually swapping my contacts over because the old phone wont swap information from phone to SIM and vice versa.


eBay
Last week I stumbled across what I deemed to be a bargain at David Jones. 3 books for $40, and included in that special were the last remaining first edition copies of "Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince" I bought one, along with a copy of Dan Brown's "Angels and Demons" and "The Bride Stripped Bare". I mulled over my bargain as I went home, and checked out eBay. I was right, copies of HP & the Half-Blood prince were going for more than $13 each... That night I went back and for the princely sum of $40 started speculating on eBay. It was very exciting when my listing received its first bid, and the excitement waned from there as it hasn't as yet had any further bids. There are, however, 10 people watching it... and I haven't told 10 people about it, so there *must* be some more interested buyers lurking for that last minute bargain, mustn't there?

I saw too late (as I was peeling stickers off it) that there was a touch of damage to the dust cover of this edition, which is why it went up first (leading with the weakest). The other two copies (one an adult cover) I haven't quite decided how to manage. I could keep them for a while as they can only go up in value really, or I could sell them to get a quick short term profit.... ahhh the decisions! I guess it will depend on how my first eBay sale goes.


Photographers
I asked a question of my friends a couple of weeks ago, that it seems I didn't want an answer for. It was with regard to a wedding photographer... One of the hardest components to decide on, for me.

Our original budget for a photographer started at zero, then went to $500, then went to $1,500, and now is at the $2k mark... As you can see, there have been some changes in expectations of a photographer in that time. Photography is also something people comment on when reminiscing about their day, especially if they got it wrong. I've heard a couple of friends and family wish they'd chosen different people, communicated more clearly, spent more money or chosen a different photographer. My original thought with regard to photography was that the people were more important than the things. Documenting the day was important, but documenting the people was the goal. This still holds true, but the more I grasp how much we're spending on all the components, the more important that it is documented correctly becomes. I'll admit that there is also a part of me that figures that if we're getting all spiffed up like that I want some damn good pictures of me... it doesn't happen often that I like pictures of me, minimising the risk that I'll hate all the pictures of me seems like a good investment, and this is one of the few chances one gets a significant portrait done.

So, at the moment, the photographer I really like, no one is overly impressed with his offer. Fair enough. I met him, and I clicked with him, he said the right things, he impressed me. (Those in sales take heed - personal connections are important). He offers a lot of time with his service, and not much specifically to touch and feel.

Since then, a photographer who has been sending me fliers from pretty much the first expo I went to has come up with a "show special" that interests me. Her basic package was way over my budget, and didn't include ownership of the digital images, so I'd always discounted her. Now, courtesy of the man mentioned above, the price realisation kicked in, that if I want a professional i will have to pay for it... so her price is in the range (if not slightly under it), and then she added the show special of a disc of all the shots.... bingo! She has my attention.
Tonight we are going to check out her studio and albums... see her work beyond the glossy brochure she sent.

Of course, BabyCakes has to like the photographer too. I realised the other night whilst discussing our options, that the photographer we choose will be sharing and be involved with a significant proportion of our day, they HAVE to fit with us, they have to make sense for us, and what we need.


Dressmakers
Ugh. This has been a task that I thought was going to be much easier, and much more fun that it has turned out to be. I have some specific ideas of what I want, and it seems to simple to me, and yet, people keep telling me how much more difficult (and therefore expensive), it really is.

I've been in touch with two whose names I got from Gardam's Fabrics and am in the process of trying to get together for a meeting (and not embarrass myself like last time). It looks like the week after next I'll have a meeting, and go from there.

I'm glad I don't have the added stress of worrying excessively over the cost - I've been offered my dress as a gift so that I do not let the dollar signs influence my decisions beyond what I really want. Thank you!




Well, I think that is a big enough post for today. Hopefully I won't leave it so long between posts next time!

BabyCakes Has a Wallet!

You might think this a bit of an obvious statement, but we've spent two days looking for it, and asking other people to look for it in their belongings. It was on the top of BabyCakes' computer desk...

...enough said!

On with the more fun things.... I finished reading Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows today... it was fun, and an easy read, once I found the time to read it. I'm not going to cry myself to sleep knowing that the series is over. BabyCakes bought me the book on Saturday morning as he passed the table of them at Kmart. It is the first one in the series I haven't borrowed from the library, and therefore, the only one I read close to it's release date.


Life has been a bit busy of late, I was out at Farm Fantastic at Caboolture on Friday through to Sunday, helping a friend by trying to pretend I know something about plants. The first two days were long and tiring (and the 6am starts were tedious), but the last day hurt a lot. The tiredness settled, the aches felt like they'd never leave and the very slow customer flow was utterly demoralising. The morning rain showers did not help either (an outside stall). We had to load the vast majority of plants that had been brought from Sydney back into the truck as darkness fell on Sunday night. There was a (small) profit turned from the event, but the money was made not from plant sales, but from the extra paraphernalia of planter pots, hand painted resin birds, butterfly magnets and buckets. It was an odd experience. I'd never done an outdoor show selling plants - they've all been under cover or indoors in the past - the relentless wind and dust was draining.




I'm sure there has been more stuff since I last wrote, but I can't think of it at the moment!

I'm Getting Really Excited!

This week I've been looking at (in some detail) two big ticket items for the upcoming nuptials - the honeymoon, and the photographer.

For the honeymoon we are going to go on an Alaskan glacier cruise up the inside passage (not as rude as it sounds people!). I found this news article today, which has made me pretty much wiggle with excitement. I think that because I have been in contact with travel agents, and BabyCakes and I have settled on an outline itinerary that things are finally seeming very real.

It turns out that if one wants to cruise in May, now is about the time one should investigate them for the best (earlybird) prices. We've picked our cruise (best value for money for us), which fits into our schedule and now, I think just about all there is left to do is give someone money for it!

We'll also have a few days in Vancouver before we cruise, to hopefully catch up with my wifey and see the sights.

Yay!!!



I met a photographer at the weekend wedding expo I went to, which was really cool, till I read what his fee was! After much deliberation and to-ing and fro-ing I have come to the conclusion that I think I will regret skimping on this, despite how much I want to come in on budget for it. The budget has already been upgraded once to accommodate photography (not an initial priority), but the more time goes on, the more it seems necessary to get the *right* photographer for us. That's not the cheapest one, nor the most expensive one, but the one that will give us what we want, in a way that works for us.

Jason seems like a good fit, and a guy who has similar value structure to me when it comes to weddings! He shares copyright with the client, so we can get them printed anywhere, and he will have prints done for us, virtually at cost price. He and another photographer will be in attendance till the job is finished (no clock watching), and each picture supplied on disk will have time spent on it for colour correction etc. He has some spectacular shots on his website, and his corporate site has amazing photos too. I think the time involved alone will prove value for money, before the artistry of the shots are taken into account. I look forward to having some spectacular photos of our own.

What a HUGE Weekend

I found my new favourite bottle shop, went to a wedding expo with my Step Mum and Sister, ironed out details in my planned wedding dress, bought a new frock for a cocktail party on Thursday night and had my first ever golf driving range experience....

I almost get tired just typing it all out!

Golfing was kinda fun, and BabyCakes got *really* excited about doing it, which was great. It was good to go out and do something active (not quite "a work out", but better than sitting at home watching movies or playing video games). BabyCakes promises that I did "quite well for (my) first time"... I've been scared of golf since my teenage forays into mini golf... they took me long enough to complete! This is an effort to get past that, and try to learn new things, and most importantly, do active (non-passive) things with BabyCakes. Today was a good, and not too intimidating start - I only duffed a few of them, and even managed to get some fairly decent shots in! We'll probably do another range visit or two, and then maybe attempt a chip and putt course I found near my brother's place.

The cocktail dress hunting was a fantastically successful mission! I found a dress for $50!! Usually when I work out I need clothes for a specific event I can't find them. I found a few dresses to try on (a very few, but that is the joy about being a size 16 - apparently bigger girls don't need to look glamorous - only size 6 - 12s. The dress I came home with was not only one of the cheapest (yay), but the only one as BabyCakes pointed out, that did not require me pulling at it as I walked out of the change room.... I was surprised that the style was as forgiving as it is as it is a stretch fabric, and a dress that on the rack looks like a dress for those pesky size 10s! Now I just need some good "foundation" undies (I'm getting old) and I should be all set! BabyCakes was amazingly patient and a very diligent shopping offsider... he event went looking for dresses for me, and did not once complain when I suddenly stopped when I saw a dress in a window. He offered opinion when asked for it, and waited outside several dressing rooms without complaint. He even paid for the dress once it was picked!! - Back off ladies, he's mine!

The cocktail party should be fun... BabyCakes' cousin is in the Navy and his ship is in town this week. BabyCakes' cousin has invited us, along with more cousins, to come along to the party. - There have been threats for the boys to dress up as a construction worker, policeman, Native American, biker, and cowboy, so the invitee will fit right in, as he will be in his dress uniform! I think realistically, that it won't happen.

The wedding expo was great fun - M & L had never been to one before, so they were all right eyed and excited. I have now been to three, so was a touch more jaded and aware of how "samey" they can get. The three of us sent out our good vibes for me to win the major prize of $8.5k worth of professional services.... but I didn't win, which is fine, as it would have meant a few changes to the existing plans!! What the day did do, was give me a chance to talk over my ideas for my wedding frock, and as M is a very accomplished dressmaker, she's useful person to talk to such things about! We stopped in at Gardams and looked at both patterns and fabrics. Which gave me the strength to think that what I want is not as freakish as I was starting to wonder! They even gave me the cards of a couple of dressmakers to talk to. Hopefully I will find one that I can work with, as the last one I was hoping to talk to has left the country!!

It was a productive weekend. It was fun!

LOLcats - a fave of mine for a while...

I wonder how long till we see it on "Today" or "Sunrise" as a fluff piece now that the Australian mainstream media has found it? I love their very dry way of trying to explain how you at home can also make some lolcats! It should be pretty obvious how to do it once you've looked at a few of the pictures...

I'm so geeky, I went to the cheez to tell them!


My fave (set as my desktop, and has been for some time now) is :

Happycat has run out of happy :(

Life

Life is hectic, but then again I don't know many people that this is not true for.

We had a nice weekend (which flew by altogether too quickly), with a lot of impromptu catching up with friends and family we hadn't seen for what feels an age. We still have more people we need to catch up with, but we are slowly getting round to see people. - Pity the laundry pile is getting bigger!

The current cold weather is also conspiring to keep the bedroom in a state of mustiness, keeping the room closed up in an effort to keep the cold out, and the fact that it now takes a day and a half to get the laundry dry on the line - that's a long term commitment over the course of a weekend!

I feel the need to almost start the spring cleaning-esque stock take (and the subsequent clean out that tends to go with it) as I look around our den/office/computer room and the accumulated "stuff" that is starting to pile, most notably on my desk.

My boss hasn't contacted me to tell me if I work today, after a call yesterday, and one this morning, both unanswered...

I guess if I don't hear by midday I've got the day off....

Wrestling With A Wedding Budget

Yesterday I made an embarrassing mistake. I'd made an appointment with a dressmaker (for "the" dress), and whilst I had mentioned that price would need to be discussed, I didn't specifically ask for a ball park figure. So, my Matron of Honour (MOH) and I met up and went off to talk with the dressmaker.

I had been into the city prior to the appointment and had bought some samples to play with, so I pulled out my collection of pictures of dresses that had inspired me, and my fabric and colour swatches, and was having a lot of fun discussing length of dress, style, colour, sleeves vs. sleeveless. The dressmaker started an impassioned plea for upgrading my fabric to silk because "it is so much nicer", "the look is much better", and "it IS your wedding dress". I thought I did quite well not to fall off my chair when I asked how much it was, and she replied with a calm "$98 a metre" (instead of the $18.99 option I'd sampled). I knew the style of dress I want requires more than just enough fabric to wrap around me... considerably more - 4.5 to 5 metres of fabric in fact... and then it needs to be lined, the interfacing, boning, the other accent pieces and the petticoats and all sorts... I was getting dangerously close to my imagined budget in materials alone.

The dressmaker must have read my face at the same time, and asked me my budget, and did have the courtesy not to outright laugh at me when I told her, but I think there was a titter. Let's just say she thought there would be $1,100 labour alone - and that is with no beading, no train and no lace work.

I should not have been surprised. The wedding "industry" is built around the "But it is you WEDDING!!!!? THE most important day of your life.... " principle.

The pragmatist in me says it is ONE day of my life. An important one, don't get me wrong... but just one...

The suppliers focus on how everything must be "just so", whilst I try to come to terms with the single use nature of what it is I'm doing. I thought I'd managed to find a balance, until I discovered that most brides seem to think that $1,500+ on ONE dress is a reasonable thing.

We left the dressmakers and went for a cup of tea.

We then decided to go look at ready made dresses at a "clearance" shop, given that our girlie bonding over dresses had ended prematurely. It was fun. I tried on about 4 dresses I had no intention of buying... they were all at the $1500 mark, and if I wanted to spend at that level, I'd get a custom made dress.

As always, the last one I tried on was the one that worked best, and the lady was even kind enough to indulge me with a veil to complete the look. My MOH almost cried.... because I was looking very um "bride-y".

The penultimate dress had a neckline cut to the bottom of my bra... and if you know the size of my boobs... that's a bit much cleavage to be flashing - Dad's (imagined) threats of "You can't leave the house in THAT" is not what a bride wants on her wedding day... nor having to go to the wedding with a cardigan on over the frock one just forked out $1,500 for!!!


I had a nice day with my MOH. I do however, feel that almost back to square one on the dress options though. I do know that there are shops that have dresses in my price range, but they aren't the dress I want. I know the dress I want doesn't have to be that complicated to make.
I will chase up some smaller dressmakers that work from home. I would also consider making it myself, it is after all, a dress I plan to wear once.

Or, I might have to look at spending more :/

Nobody Move, I dropped My Brain!

We were given some movie vouchers for our engagement, which we used today to see Pirates of the Caribbean : At World's End.

It was good fun, and much more satisfying than the middle installment... I mean, it actually had an ending.


On the down side, I worked out that someone tried to break into my car last night... and made my lock kinda difficult to use :( It is the first time I've had to deal with such a dilemma, and it is weird! I'm pissed off that someone tried to violate what is mine... and that they damaged my car at a time when an insurance claim would not be financially viable... my excess is already prohibitively high!

Ahh, another life experience to learn from - I just wish it was an experience like the one I had last week.... of putting up a marquee.... THAT was a cool experience to have. They boys' heads managed not to explode from seeing a girl swing a sledge hammer either!

egads... has it been *that* long?

I'm back from our little holiday jaunt... we're home safe and sound, and the cat is glad to have some cuddles again.

1800kms by road really is quite wearying, but I will write more in the next few days as feeling returns to my butt...

Weirdness

I'm starting to have nightmares about the wedding...

I woke up in the early hours of this morning quite distressed because of a dream where I had been almost hysterical when I'd worked out that I'd made a very stupid and obvious mistake by trying to move the wedding overseas the week before the date.... Someone - I'm not sure who - talked me into it, and just as everything was getting set up I had a huge panic attack, realising that i was going to have 150 people turn up in Brisbane, not the tropical island I was on. So I yelled at and generally hyperventilated on Paul Keating - because he's such an obvious guest to have at our wedding!

I had another weird dream about the wedding last week too (but in the way of dreams I can't remember what it was now).

BabyCakes thinks this last one stems from the weekend, where we stopped in at the venue for the Engagement Party, and found out that we and the venue had a different understanding of what we were hiring. We found out we didn't have the space allocated that we thought we did. There was a HUGE miscommunication because they did not clarify and I did not clarify - they knew what they thought they were asking, and we thought we did too, but we didn't. I'm just glad that I have a week to wrap my head around it, because if I had turned up on the day to be told, I would have either cried or yelled - it was even pretty close when I was told - I started getting red, and then I processed the thoughts more, and got redder, and thought of it more and got redder.... I had to walk away and just deal with it without getting the staff there offside.

Now I'm at a point of "it is what it is" because we can't change it. I shan't be taking my business back to the venue for quite a while though.

Spectacular, Spectacular

Yesterday Baby Cakes and I went to the 2007 Brisbane Hot Rod and Street Machine Spectacular at the RNA show grounds. That is a picture of a $7.50 piece of paper (tickets were $15 and that's half of one...).

I had fun, the cars were shiny and pretty. BabyCakes had fun except for the fact that he only saw one person whom he knew. I tried to give him solace in the fact that whilst there might only be one person who he knew, his impact was such that the guy still refused to acknowledge him, 4 years after leaving the industry - I guess the paint business is pretty cut-throat!

We saw some pretty amazing cars, some for how low they were, some for how schmick they were, and some for the astounding design choices people make that don't gel with our sensibilities. I couldn't get over the pin striping on one car - they had spent so much time, effort and I'm sure money, on creating an absolutely seamless clean lined look and then put a pin strip on that looked like it had been done by a 12 year old boy with the wrong paint brush. It was a designed choice but it made no sense to me.

Equally stymieing but much more fun, was a Torana they put on a Dyno machine, just so we could see how much horsepower it had. It was a drag car which had the very cool number plates of "IN DEBT" which made me laugh. The MC then explained that the engine alone was worth $60k, and BabyCakes guestimated the total cost of the car around $130k. That's a serious hobby! The Torana had to be strapped to the Dyno with no less than 6 ratchet straps, had an engine of over 680 cubic inches and ended up on its second ear splittingly loud attempt that we saw, at the 719 horsepower mark. I think the street legal 6 cyl Mazda before hand managed around 370... It was loud and smelly, but impressive, made better for the fact that we actually managed to get a seat in the stands of the "Dyno Pit".

We saw some really cool 57 chevvies, lots of them, but this one was the stand out.

We will be trying to get in touch with the owners via the car club, to see if we can convince them to do a wedding *wink*

BabyCakes never ceases to be amazed what I can link back to the wedding.... He has admitted though that he's glad I'm excited by the wedding rather than the alternative!


We spent the rest of the weekend staying at BabyCakes' parents house. Mrs Cakes is not recovering from her chemo as well as we would have liked to have seen, and so we hung around to give both Mr and Mrs Cakes a bit of support and a bit of a change of pace. We managed to ply Mrs Cakes with a fair bit of food and some different food from that which Mr Cakes tends to supply. We also managed to impart tips and tricks of bulking out snacks and meals with vitamins and the ever important fluids. We were happy enough with the outcomes that we left ;) - BabyCakes probably would have stayed on a bit longer if it was thought to be useful. I'm glad on a purely selfish level that he's at home with the cat and me! :)

May the 4th Be With You.......

My brother sent it to me... I couldn't help but pass it on! (get it??? May 4th... that's today's date har har har!)

Yesterday was a big day for BabyCakes and I - it was our minus one anniversary... 12 months to the day of our wedding - how very exciting!!

We had also inadvertently booked in to meet with our celebrant yesterday, to make sure he was the right one for us, which on having a more in depth chat, he is! It seems quite serendipitous that our first official meeting was one year to the day before the wedding.

We filled out our Notice of Intention to Marry too, so the government knows we want to marry!


The day got bigger too.........




BabyCakes is now a one car man! Someone finally came up with the money for the Commodore. He's a young guy who works for an upholstery company, so he can fix up the interior which was starting to show how old it was... The guy was very excited by the work BabyCakes had done on it, saying "Everything I would have done, you did do!".

I hope he enjoys his new car, I know BabyCakes did. He's done exceptionally well seeing it go; some sadness, but overall, mostly happy... especially to have a big cheque in his hand!


Oh, and Happy Birthday for yesterday Carbs!

Fingers Crossed Still

BabyCakes has been given a deposit for his car. They guy who gave him the money has had his Mum and his Dad around to look at the car. They say the money will be in the bank on Thursday or Friday.

I won't be able to relax till I see the money in the account. Once bitten, twice shy.


We had our first money "discussion" on the weekend. It was weird.

Cross your fingers!

BabyCakes' car is still sitting out the front on the street. The good news is that in the past two days 3 people have been to see it, and more have registered interest. The most exciting news is the young guy that came tonight is bringing his Mum back to look at it tomorrow morning.

Cross your fingers (and anything else you can think of) in hopes that we might be able to sell it sometime soon.

I would rather the money in a bank account to go towards our wedding!

Tell me what you think....

For those of you that know me, feel free to go here and tell me how you see me :) Feedback can be given anonymously...

This is what people have said about me.


This one is the not so nice side of things (but equally as interesting - I guess there will be a few more anonymous ones there ;))

This is what people have said about me.

Where do the days go?

It's been a while since I posted. For a number of reasons. We've had some very busy weekends, mostly socialising with family.

We've been trying to sort out the finer details of the engagement party, and tie down some of the arrangements for the wedding.

Tomorrow night we meet with a wedding co-ordinator at our venue of choice. Hopefully we can confirm a menu and book everything in.

I found a very cool piece of software the other day called iDo couples edition. It is a piece of software to keep track of all the bits and pieces that go to making up a wedding... well most of the bits. I would like a little more detail/customisation to truly rave about it, but I'm picky like that! It has a 30 day free trial of it, which is how I have been using it. I think I will be purchasing the key though, unless I can find a better piece of software before then....

A Sad Day

Today my brother, who has recently come back from the U.S., told me his wife of four and a half years told him she did not plan to join him in Australia.

He's recently moved up to Rockhampton, having organised a job and a house, expecting that his wife and child would join him soon. Seemingly his wife did not expect him to do so well in providing these necessities and was almost upset when he called to tell her.

What this also means is that my brother misses out on seeing his son and given that he cannot go back to the U.S. for some time, doesn't have much opportunity to see him unless his (now estranged) wife brings the child to him.

I'm saddened for my brother and my thoughts are with him in this frustrating and devastating time.


Unfortunately, I'm not surprised that this is where things have got to. The longer my brother was without them, the easier it was going to be for her to not make the move. Shocking as it is.

Big Brother Blogger

My big brother has decided to start a blog (and continue it hopefully!) His blog is listed in the "Blogs I read" link section, and can also be found by channeling the Ramblings of Raoul.

He's a funny guy with a very um, unique persepective on the world. Reading our blogs together might shed some light on how/why we turned out the way we did! :P - Or it might not!


I'm looking forward to reading more about what is happening in his life - he's in the process of planning a wedding too (or at least his fiancé is!), he's starting his own business and has a 9-5 job as well. Should be a lot of blog fodder!

Shakespeare Like You've Never Seen Him!

If you've got some time to watch silly movies, these are fun :)


Tales for the L33t - Part 1 - Romeo and Juliet

Tales for the L33t - Part 2 - Hamlet

It's been a little while.

I needed some time and space to think, and privately. Dad had a couple of stents in during his angiogram, which in itself is good, if it stops more of these hospital visits and makes him feel better. The fact that he needed them so soon after his bypass surgery is disturbing.

My Dad means the world to me and I needed to ponder life and death and how everything fits together for me at the moment. The good news is, that for me, life is fitting together ok. It could be better, but it could certainly be worse. I'm so glad I have BabyCakes in my life because I think that without him, I'd be lost.

We had a big disappointment with the sale of BabyCakes' Commodore falling through, again. Young guys these days don't seem to realise that when negotiating a cash price, they should actually have the CASH in their hands... we've had 2 guys negotiate a cash price and then have their finance fall through, one is still trying to find someone to give him the money... the other just wanted the price to be dropped to what they could get.........

Last night we went to a bridal expo, which is a very interesting experience. everything from a very hard sell to a guy who made me feel like I should put his business card back on the table... I doubt I'll buy from him even if he had anything I wanted.

BabyCakes and I would really like to get hot rods/muscle cars for our wedding cars, and anytime we've found anything close to it, they've been self drive hire cars. I don't understand it, I would have thought one would want to look after their babies... I certainly don't really want any of our families to be responsible for a car that is not their own. I just want some drivers to pick us off, drop us off, take some pics with the cars, drive us to the next spot and then I can forget about cars.... I guess I'll keep trawling hot rod websites and see who can help us out :)

I'm starting to realise that time is creeping on at this point, and the more we can get settled soon, the better off we will be. We had a celebrant turn us down due to not wanting to book a long weekend, which is fine... but our first "unavailability".

I haven't even contacted a dress maker yet, and I'm pretty sure I want a dress made for me. I think it might be time to start getting a bit serious.

We have a cake, and venues for wedding and for reception picked.... it's a good start.

What a week - already!

Dad is in hospital again. More unexplained chest pains. Hopefully today's angiogram will help work out why this has happened again. Dad's doing fine, I think we're all more freaked out than he is!

I went and saw Dad last night and had a great meandering chat with him, which was fun. We talk about everything and anything, which is a good way to get a lot of topics covered!


On a completely different note, this little flash movie was brought to my attention. Cuke Skywalker, Darth Tater, Tofu-D2 - comedy gold I tell ya!! It cracked me up, and a giggle is always a nice way to start the day!

I've already sent this one round to a few people, because there was a chance to win a Trans Am! It's cute too, and what I think things would really be like if someone less cooler than The Hoff was Michael Knight!

Happy St Patricks Day.

Last year this was one of the most stressful days of my life. Solicitors and bankers really do forget that they are talking about one's live and usually the biggest financial commitments one can make. My mortgage is one year old today!

I remember being very nervous, sitting in a flat full of boxes, hoping like mad that everything would go ok, and that I'd eventually get the phone call to say I could go pick up my keys.... MY keys... ones that no one else would have a copy of (in theory).

As soon as I did take delivery of those keys I was around here in a flash. I slept on a matress on a floor of my lounge room, with BabyCakes to share the moment. We'd had a bottle of bubbles and a fantastic floor picnic, it was very exciting. The move was left until Saturday morning, and my brother came to help. It was a relatively stress free move, except for the sofa bed - the boys tried to talk me into buying a new sofa, and leaving that heavy and over sized monster downstairs in the garage. I stayed strong, as my budget required, and they got help from my Dad and step-brother, and together, they got my sofa bed over the balcony rail (from the back of a ute) and into my lounge.

This year, "my" flat is now "our flat". BabyCakes and I are getting married and planning a life together. Congratulations BabyCakes, you are now half responsible for my mortgage!! Once we're married we can make it all legal like, since I'll be changing my name on the accounts anyway.

I've had a year of owning property solo. Today I publicly acknowledge that it is not solely mine any longer, but ours. Welcome to the I've-got-a-mortgage-which-means-I've-got-huge-scary-debt-club BabyCakes! It's fun!

Last Week I Rediscovered My Local Library

It had obviously been a while since I'd been to a council library - they turned off my card. The guy behind the counter couldn't even find my record to reactivate it, he had to put in all my details again from scratch!

I had a sudden realisation last week as I scrolled through eBay, looking at all the things I "needed" to buy. I didn't have to buy these reference books - I could borrow them! After searching the elibcat, I was even more delighted to discover that they had cake decorating books at my local library! I had just saved my self considerable money by not having to buy so much wedding porn (as BabyCakes likes to call it). It also saved us both a lot of time at the cake tasting, because we had an idea of what we wanted before we got there and just had to worry about the finer details once we had a specialist with us.

Whilst wandering the shelves I also remembered that I can borrow novels... and borrow novels I did! Consequently, I've read a lot in the last week, a couple of days I read one book a day - not working* affords one all kinds of luxuries.

The first book I read was called "Faking It" By Jennifer Cruise. Despite being told not to judge a book by its cover, we all know we do, and this one was picked because it was bright and cheery - if we are looking for books that we've not read before, what else do we go on? I read the back and it seemed interesting, so the book came home with me. It was a fun and easy read. A romance novel without the Mills and Boon sensibilities. I enjoyed the quirky and bohemian household this story was set around. I easily read it in a morning, and will probably forget about it just as easily... fluff, but fun fluff.

Next I read "Rules of Passion" by Sara Bennett. This one was picked because after finding the first novel, I realised that I didn't have to buy cheap romance novels, I could borrow them and get my escapist fix. This one had a love heart sticker on the spine - Librarians helpfully put these stickers on to identify the genre of books for lazy people YAY! (I pity the person who picks up the copy of "Beauty's Release" that I borrowed once - it might have been "Beauty's Punishment".... but that does not matter... The librarian had seen that the writer was Anne Rice (under a pseudonym), and stuck a horror sticker on the spine... I guess to some people it might be horrifying, but I think it would have been better served with a love heart sticker! - I don't know that hey have an "erotica" or "soft core porn" sticker). Anyway, this was an easily identified romance novel, set in Victorian England, lots of dukes and lords and stuff, and courtesans... now, that just screamed great romantic read to me, added with the fact that the main character decided she wanted to be a courtesan too, I figured there was a good chance this could be an interesting romance novel. It took a bit more commitment to read it in a day, but hey, I had time on my hands, so I did. I enjoyed it enough to go back to elibcat and find out whether the other two books in the series were at my library!

Then, I went with my "trolling by author" pick... an Anne Rice novel I hadn't read - "Christ the Lord". This was an interesting read. It took longer to read than the other two, over a good two or three days in a few hour or two stints. It is basically a fictionalised story of Christ's childhood - the bits the bible left out.
I found it interesting for the historical aspect of how a devout Jewish family lived, how they worked and loved. Anne Rice tends to write fiction within a shell of fact, truth, honesty, which makes it easy to believe it as a story, your brain doesn't have to suspend its disbelief so far. I liked it. I liked that it was a simple story of a boy of 7 or 8, who sees a lot of weird stuff, and hears of lot of whispering, which stops when he is near enough to hear. His isolation despite being part of a big group, a big family. It is a fictional story about a person/character that people get upset if you treat wrong. I liked it, but then again, I'm a believer who liked "The DaVinci Code" as a read, and didn't find it sacrilegious - it is a story - fiction! To be perfectly honest, I don't understand "sacrilege" other than disrespect, but disrespect is not something you are vindictive for, it is something you rise above. This book is not disrespectful.

Now, I am reading "Memoirs of a Geisha" by Arthur Golden. I picked this one because I read it years ago, at a friend's house when I was visiting Melbourne. I enjoyed it then, and wanted to re-read it to see if I still did. I haven't seen the "major motion picture" touted on the cover of this edition, but maybe I will after I finish the book.

I'm almost ready to take back the huge stack of books I borrowed, now that the cake selection has been done (I've added a couple of pics to the wedding cake post, if people are curious), I don't think I need to keep the cake making books, and I'm almost out of novels to read.... Luckily I have plenty of time to go back and pick out some more!


* My boss keeps calling me to tell me he doesn't have work for me at this stage. While the luxury of time off is great, it does get a bit disconcerting, to be at someones whim is a surprisingly difficult way to live. At the moment it is not too bad because he is giving me a week at a time off, which means I can make plans etc. It gets very difficult when each day to the next I think I'm working, to find out when I wake up that I'm not.

What all this extra time off is giving me is a lot of time to think - which has its pros and cons! I'm starting to think I want a second job, a casual job, which can be solely used to pay for the wedding - with any luck I could earn enough to pay for a kick arse wedding and honeymoon!

We Went Cake Tasting Tonight....

...and picked out our wedding cake! It is going to have FOUR TIERS!!!!!!!! It is a very pretty cake too.... YAY!

We've decided to serve it as dessert at the wedding.

I'm so excited :)

We went to Merivale Cakes and Crafts, we've had one of their cakes before, at a wedding we went to, the proprietor knew the bride and groom.

Lightening = time for me to go!

More thoughts on this (five days later):

The cake is scaring me now... not the cake itself, the cake is pretty, but the price of it. I've had one person go silent in shock when I mentioned the price, and others tell me I should keep in mind that it is dessert for up to 100 people, and therefore the price is quite reasonable... I just know I could make a lot of cake for that kind of money.... but I also know, that that kind of pressure in the lead up to the day, is bad... being able to relax is worth a lot when one is organising such a big event!

These two pictures, from Peggy Porschen's "Pretty Party Cakes" are the inspiration for our cake. Ours will be white, round and stacked like the pink cake, but will have daisies, which will actually be closer to an aster, given they will be a lilac/purple colour. The cakes themselves will alternate between fruitcake and white mud cake. Now I just have to convince myself that the money spent (not due till closer to the time) on them will be money well spent...

A Cat Shows It Loves You......

By bringing you presents you wish you didn't have... like dead rats.

Don't get me wrong, I'd rather she picked on rats than birds, but still - EW!

Luckily BabyCakes likes me showing my feminine side, which manifests itself in this situation by giving him the plastic bag and asking him to "deal with it".

I guess now I have to frock up and show BabyCakes how much I like his masculinity in a decidedly feminine way!

Yay!

Today I regained my open drivers licence! I will be endeavouring to make sure I never ever go back to my provisional licence again.

I cannot express enough how much I regret the night two days before BabyCakes called me...

Two Birthdays, a Naming Day, Visiting a Sibling Not Seen For Years, and a Hospital Trip

It's been a big weekend.

I'm sorry if we offended anyone with our various departures on Sunday, no offence was meant, BabyCakes and I just needed some time to work through all that's been happening.

My brother is back from the USA (not by choice), and is trying to sort things out to get his wife and child here, but it was good to see him.

We had a lovely day celebrating a friend's 32nd birthday (younger than me by a month, and lets me know it!). We had a lovely relaxed time at Sirromet winery, eating, wine tasting and listening to jazz. Happy Birthday Mrs C!

A beautiful naming day and first birthday for the fantastic Mr Grommit, who performed beautifully on cue, and had fun playing with helium balloons and empty plastic soft drink bottles when he could escape the clutches of various clucky women, and some men too! Thank you Grommit and family for involving us in this special day.

BabyCakes' mum was discharged from hospital later in the day, but all round a stressful experience, especially the emotional impact of everything.

Tonight we're not answering the phones unless we know we have to, and getting in some serious snuggles.

Hurry Up and Wait.

The title is a saying my Dad is very fond of, and I think of it as I wait to hear more news of his health. Dad had a heart attack and subsequent bypass surgery just after his 50th birthday.

Today he had chest pains and went to hospital.... but he's 1000kms away in Sydney, on business.

We don't know much at all, not even whether it is a heart attack - they have to wait on tests. We don't know if he can come home, we don't know if he'll need more surgery.

Dad often said since his surgery that he felt better than new.

This is a bit scary!

The Things We Do To Save Money....

I'm contemplating making (at the very least) our engagement cake.... I plan it to be a test run for potentially making a wedding cake.

I've been looking at wedding cakes, and they are beautiful but expensive. Most of it has to come down to the time it takes to make them.

When I was in high school I decorated a Christmas cake and it looked fantastic. I figure I've actually learned some patience since then, so I have a hope of making a cake that looks pretty good.

I think where I started from was contemplating the cupcake tower and figuring that it'd have to be cheaper to do it myself.... making and icing 100 cupcakes has got to cost some dollars, whereas if one keeps it simple and does it oneself, it has to be a chance to save some dosh! The problems with cupcakes is the freshness factor of a spongey type cake - mudcakes (BabyCakes doesn't like fruit cakes) are a bit more forgiving as far as making them ahead of time.

I wouldn't contemplate it at all if I thought I would do a half arsed job....

If the engagement cake does not work out I will probably be talking to The Cheesecake Shop to see how they can help me.... If I can control the decoration, then we should be able to get a simply elegant cake from there...

I figure I can buy and make a lot of cake for $300 - and forgive a simpler design if it is a lot less!

I've also been thinking a lot on bouquets, and flowers in general - I'm really glad we set our desired wedding date more than a year out - I can have a look at what happens this May!

The Die Is Rolling, Which Way Will It Land?

I made some calls today I'd put off for a while. It was nice to hide under a rock for a while and pretend I didn't have to deal with these issues.

There are definite changes afoot, I can't see the status-quo staying as it has been.

I don't know what I want from the next few weeks, but I think I'll be crying a bit in the mean time.

I'm glad I have BabyCakes to hug and kiss me each night.

Families are scary.


Or maybe I'm still doing too much thinking.

Too Much Thinking

Some things I really do not understand about myself. I had a very busy weekend. I thought it was a good weekend, productive. This week has been very quiet and left me a lot of time to think.

Over think. Now all I can see is what I said wrong, when I should have shut up and thinking of all the ways the people around me don't like me (in my head).

I just don't get it.

Getting Engaged is Life Altering...

and not just for the obvious reason. I knew a while ago that I wanted to spend my life with BabyCakes, have a family and grow old together.

What I didn't know was how much the act of organising a wedding and getting married was going to change me as a person. I've been thinking about so very much in the past few weeks, lots of it life changing.

I've had advice from all over the place that ranges from "Get eloped" to "Don't be afraid of picking what you actually want rather than what you think you can afford" and everything in-between. Mostly it has been at the elopement end of the scale - and usually from people who are married. There are of course two ways to read where this advice comes from.... those that have long had their weddings and have forgotten what it meant to them to have a wedding, or the voice of experience, those that have had the wedding and regretted spending that much money.

I never though I would spend a lot of money on a wedding, especially now that I have a mortgage. I did a "worst case scenario" budget last night, managing to find a way to keep the spending under $10,000. That doesn't include any honeymoon, photographer, car hire, favours or extended family at the wedding.

My Dad is one of six children, my Mum is one of four, my Step-Mum is one of six, I have four brothers, a stepbrother, a stepsister and a half sister.... nothing about my family is small. BabyCakes is one of four, his Mum is one of about eight (or more - lots of step brothers and sisters there), and his Dad is one of three. I have three grandparents still alive, BabyCakes doesn't.

Even without friends (and I think we're allowed friends), we have a lot of people to invite. It is confusing.

I grew up being taught how important family is. Not in a didactic way, but very very subtly, until it snuck up on me and it took someone else to point out how close we were for me to realise we were (thank you Wah!).

We moved a lot when we were kids, all across the country, and very regularly. Our family was our biggest constant growing up, sometimes that felt good, mostly as kids, that was bad......why couldn't that brother really get lost in the move? Now we (for the moment), are all over the country and even on the other side of the planet from each other, we've gained members since those bonding times, through marriage and relationships, but on the whole, we even socialise together.

I grew up to even like my family!

I'm joining another family, BabyCakes is joining mine yes, but I'm changing my name in commitment to his, to be a family ourselves.

I see that it is a big deal.

I want it to be a big deal.

Yes, it is money that doesn't seem very productive...

but it is important.

I don't plan on getting married again. I plan to get old and grey with BabyCakes. I plan to fight for our marriage. I plan to work it out, even when it hurts, and I plan to make my family with him the basis, the foundation of the rest of my life.

I want my friends and family to be there to witness this huge step in my life.

I want a kick arse party, the likes of which I'll never host again, and strange but true, I think I want that more than I want a new kitchen.

I don't think my tastes are so extravagant as to send us into debt for the start of our new life (well, not much more than we already are!).






Last year I wrote BabyCakes a poem for Valentines Day, the first time I'd ever sat down, brainstormed and wrote a poem. This year I felt bad that I had not done such a thing. I don't feel so bad now that I've cried through writing a post and found peace, but BabyCakes does that for me. I find peace with him often, and laughter, sometimes tears, but mostly laughter, and peace.


I'm glad I found BabyCakes, and I'm glad we're getting married.

How quickly everything can change!

BabyCakes and I went to the Wedding Ideas Centre at Southbank yesterday and it was quite useful. It is basically a big room with displays from different wedding suppliers with number on them. You walk through and circle numbers on a card of the displays that interest you, and they give you brochures/contact information of all the stuff you liked the look of.

One that might be getting my business is a Wedding Broker... you tell them what you want, and they do the work - and get kick backs from the suppliers, I assume. If it means they find what we want for the right price, I'd be happy to work with that.

The budget is scary though. We have to do some very hard thinking on how many people and what style of wedding reception we want. I don't think we can afford the grand plans we had at the start. Realistically, I think our potential guests would be horrified at prices we've seen and the budget form I just guestimated. If fact, I'm quite horrified. I didn't want to get into debt over this party, but I'm not sure that I have much choice if we persist with what we actually want.

Today I did manage to find a venue which looks like it might suit our needs. I hope that in the next few days/weeks I can pin this down and we can move on and start saving!

Maybe I won't need the broker after all.

I also went to visit friends today, and have a girlie day discussing all things wedding... it was fun looking through magazines and picking out styles of dresses, I think my MOH (Maid/matron of Honour) understands what it is I'm aiming for. Now I either have to find a seamstress, or find one ready made... and once again, for the right money!

I'm feeling a little more in touch with the budget for the moment, but it's still a big outlay of cash.

I guess I'll have to see how it all pans out.

The good news, and the bad news...

The good news is that you don't have to read about my home improvement plans as much any more!

The bad news is, I dare say that you will learn all about the ins and outs of preparing for a modern wedding in the coming months!

Having said that... Ikea have another $10,000 voucher give away - I'm entering, because if I win, that means there will be more money to spend on the wedding AND I still get a kitchen!


I've already tried on dresses... it's not as big a "Muriel" moment as it might seem - I only went to look and try and get an idea of styles, but I guess at midday midweek, there are not a lot of customers, so the lady encouraged me to try some on. It was great fun! You get such great personalised service, they help do the dresses up, they lent you sparkles and veils and even a bustier to get the right look. I stood there in my undies while the lady went off and kept getting me more dresses to try on! When I looked at the price of the dresses, it was easier to see how they can be so helpful! ;)

I also learned that either I'm ahead of the fashions (only time will tell) or I'm completely unfashionable (which is quite likely). They had NOTHING in the length of dress I wanted, and all the dresses I tried on had trains of varying lengths. They were fun to play dress ups in, but not what I want. We did work out why I had suspected all along, that a corset style bodice with a simple (but bouffant-ish) skirt flatters my shape. I'm contemplating a custom made corset - one doesn't get that opportunity to splash out that way very often! I did have a look through the Vollers online catalogue the other day - which was an interesting task till I worked out there is a glitch with Firefox that means you have to click on buttons about 1.5 cms under where they appear!), and I also looked at Gallery Serpentine's corsets. Unfortunately Gallery Serpentine don't seem to have any patterns in the style I really like, with the shaped cup (see style v1106 in the Vollers catalogue) .

I might contact them today and see what my options are. Given they are at least in the same country as I, it would make things a lot easier to be able to get fitted and ask for personal details rather than just ordering and hoping for the best! I don't mind the shape of the Femme Fatale Strapless, but prefer the front fastening busk of the Edwardian.

I have a while to make up my mind as to what I want ;)

Wedding Planning...... Engagement Party Date!

Wedding planning is scary!

There are so many things to spend money on, and so many people willing to help you spend that money!

We picked a figure out of the air for how much money we want to spend on a wedding. Then we looked at what things cost... then we realised we probably need to spend more!

If one is serving any kind of food, or supplying any kind of alcohol, then costs are high. Add in that BabyCakes and I both come from large-ish families, and we have a "small" wedding of about 100 people....

We are in the process of getting information from where we really want to have our reception, and if the prices fit with our budget, then I think we have the two really big decisions set... Venues for the wedding and reception... but if one doesn't pan out, then we will probably reevaluate both decisions...

What we have decided on though, is an engagement party. We drove past the Booroodabin Bowls Club on Saturday morning, which is where BabyCakes and I met, and thought it would be a fun place to have our engagement party. We've decided to have the party in late May, which will be about a year from the wedding (we plan that for sometime in May 2008 - note it in your diaries!). We're going to hire some rinks so we can play some barefoot bowls, and have a fun relaxed spot for some drinks and nibbles. It's going to be a late afternoon/early evening thing so it will be a child friendly event. I'm looking forward to it!

The best part is that I don't have to do dishes afterwards!!!

Stay tuned for invites in the mail a bit closer to the time (I suppose I should confirm our booking before telling people to turn up!).

There are certainly some fun elements to planning a wedding, and I choose to only think about those ones at W-15months!

BabyCakes....

...in the most disturbing sense of the word....

My brother sent the link to me. It's disturbing and interesting at the same time. I wonder would could bring themselves to eat it.

How do they know?

I was sent a link, which was quite curious..... I've seen it before, but now I have a blog, so I can bore you all with it ;)

I put in my date and got my Birth tree as:

Elm Tree, the noble-mindedness Pleasant shape, tasteful clothes, modest demands, tends not forgive mistakes, cheerful, likes to lead but not to obey, honest and faithful partner, tends to a know-all-attitude and making decisions for others, noble-minded, generous, good sense of humour, practical.

Which is a pretty good descriptor of me.

BabyCakes got:

Ash Tree, the Ambition Uncommonly attractive, vivacious, impulsive, demanding, does not care for criticism, ambitious, intelligent, talented, likes to play with its fate, can be egoistic, very reliable and trustworthy, faithful and prudent lover, sometimes brains rule over heart, but takes partnership very serious.

Which I'm sure he'll agree with (especially the uncommonly attractive bit).

Interestingly, I share a birthday (not date) with Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr; and BabyCakes shares a birthday (not date) with John F. Kennedy, Jr. - weird!

Having recently discovered that more people than I realised are reading my blog, I have adjusted my blog now so that anyone can leave comments if they wish, but non-members' posts will need approval before they will be published (to try and reduce spam).

If you feel like leaving a message on this post or any others, past or present, please do so!

I was walking along, minding my own business when....

....I suddenly realised I'm going to have to come up with, and start practicing a new signature! I think BabyCakes would be upset if I didn't take his name, despite the fact that I quite like mine, it's served me well for 30+ years!

I think I'll use both names at different times, I certainly want to be Mrs BabyCakes, but might keep my maiden name for Stage Management stuff... I don't know. Maybe it is too much maintenance to keep two names.

The other scary thing about this revelation should be clear to anyone who has seen my signature - it gets comments from the checkout operators at Coles! It's very hard to forge given that if I spend too much time thinking about it, even my own attempts look dodgy! It is very loopy, scrawly, and mostly rushed...

I guess it will work itself out in time.

The cat is still trying very hard to make me live up to my moniker but trying to send me crazier.... I had a guy from across the road come and tell me on Saturday, that if he'd caught the cat on Friday night, we wouldn't have had one... He didn't like cleaning his garage of the spray SHE had stunk it up with at 9:30 at night. That's right, my female de-sexed cat sprayed... I'd be upset too if a neighbours cat did that to me!

I tried to keep her in again, and last night she bolted through an open window - the heat was just too oppressive not to have it open. I don't know what to do, she is fast running off with my sanity and calm, and that's just wrong.

The um, colourful lady next door also weighed into the the cat issue turning up on my door step to discuss it on Saturday morning when BabyCakes was out at work... She saw how upset the issue was making me and turned up later in the day with potted herbs and plants she had bought from a clearance sale, which was amazingly sweet of her. Maybe I should feel guilty for the uncharitable thoughts I have about her, all too regularly? Or maybe she's trying to build up brownie points to blackmail is with later.....

The Future Mrs BabyCakes ?

I'd like to let you all know that BabyCakes asked me to marry him today, and I was delighted to accept!

BabyCakes snuck around to my Dad's place and asked my Dad for permission to marry me (which was granted, thankfully), and today he took me to the city botanical gardens, got down on one knee and asked me to marry him. I was shaky and teary, but delighted to say yes. He then slipped a beautiful white gold half carat solitaire onto my finger and we snogged for a bit... (very predictable, but hey, I think that's in the contract!).

We have not yet set a date for the wedding, but will let the appropriate people know when we do.

Cat and mouse...

The cat and I have settled into a new pattern. She goes outside now during the day, or at least is allowed to. She sometimes comes back in through an open window (without fly screen) and hides from the neighbours cat. Once she is in to be fed at dusk, she stays inside. Sometimes she meows plaintively at the door but we talk back to her her and she usually comes and sits with BabyCakes and myself.

I still have to keep all the windows with screens closed enough that she can't get enough leverage on them to push the screens out, but this seems to be a workable compromise - at least she doesn't seem as manic as before.

As for the mouse? It was a gift from my brother resident in Texas USA. A few years ago he sent me a geeky gamers mouse (for my computer). It was a laser mouse which had a fan in it, to keep ones hand from getting sweaty. It was a bit odd to get used to, but I did use it in hot weather. Most of the time however, I had the fan switched off as it developed an annoying rattle in it and was disturbingly loud. Last week though, the laser died, and with it, the mouse lost all usefulness and I had to let it go (and buy a new one).

BabyCakes is off today to have fun at the Big Day Out.

Is there ever really a selfless action?

Julia Gillard (deputy leader of the opposition) stated that she believed that it would be ALMOST impossible to get to the top job in politics and be a mother as well. To say the public comment on it has been spirited is an understatement. Look at that comment again.... almost impossible, she didn't even say it cannot be done, she just said it would be very hard. You'd think she had said all women should stay in the kitchen and leave the work thing to men (which is pretty much a paraphrase of a comment I HAVE heard - from a woman). I honestly cannot see anything wrong with her expression her opinion this way.

I want to know why women who do not want children are labelled selfish, men do not seem to have the same expectation. I've seen plenty of women have children to fill a hole in their life.... that sounds selfish to me.

Does it also follow that people who can not have children are non-people?

This has been a bit of a ponderous thought for me for a while. Lots of people around me are having babies. Within my family it seems I'm a non-person as a childless spinster, everything revolves around the children in the family. (I'm sure this is not intended to be the case, but it sure feels like it - supported by the instance of my brother turning up for a family function without the children in tow as they had another engagement - the message was clear that he should not have done such a thing.) Do not get me wrong, my nieces and nephew are delightful children and they bring a whole new dynamic to the group gatherings and I love them to bits, but why are we no longer people worth knowing unless there is a child in our arms?

I suspect this is a very primal issue, procreation is a very strong force, and there are times when I desperately want a child, but there are also times when it scares the living heck out of me/I do not trust myself with being guardian over another life (but this has been the case for as long as I can remember). Why do people have to be so cruel in their derision for people who do not have children?

Why is it, in an educated society are Julia Gillard's comments so reaction provoking? Why is it that men do not seem forced to make decisions of career OR family in the same way women are? Why is it that teenage boys do not think about how to balance parenthood and a career? I'm not talking about pregnancy and birth here, I'm talking parenthood.

On the flip side, if either a man or a woman decided to that they wanted a family, as their largest priority, and did not want to work to be able to spend time with their children, why do we have to poo-poo it? "I want to be a parent when I grow up" is not an acceptable response on career day any more. I would love to meet a man who would be prepared to stay at home with the children and keep house.

Men and women are different. Celebrate it. Difference does not have to imply weakness, indeed our very differences should make us stronger, as teams.

Me, personally, I still oscillate on a pretty much daily basis as to whether I want children. When I knew I did not have an option it drove my every thought. Now that the door is open, I can walk past it without peeking in. (That I desperately wanted what I couldn't have is in my opinion just another way that I am completely human... I believe the human condition is to want what we do not have, it keeps us moving.)

I think Julia Gillard is pretty much on the money though. If you really really want the top job in anything, something has to give, there are only 24 hours in a day - and that goes for men and women. Why shouldn't she be able to leave her husband at home with the babies whilst she pursues her career? I think the witch hunt that would ensue would be of mammoth proportions.

People claim we are civilised and have moved beyond our primal urges, yet when someone decides to live that value, they are publicly vilified. People still make most of their decisions based on primal urges, and more women think with their genitals than would like to admit to it - another perfectly human trait.

If I (with BabyCakes), decide not to have children, it is a selfish decision. If we decide to have children, it will most definitely be a selfish decision. I know that I'll be better accepted with a child on my hip though.

/Rant

My fur-kid is giving me enough grief at the moment, I think I'll stick to that for the moment. The damn cat will not stay inside at the moment. I relented yesterday and let her out during the day. Last night she was relentless in patrolling the fly screens until she broke one and escaped. Do I give in to her tactics and let her out whenever she wants, get another cat to keep her company inside or lock the flat up tighter than a drum when I go to bed so she can't get out?

Egads, she'll turn me grey she will!

Sun, sea, sand, snags and sore spots

I have an admission to make.

I mentioned in an earlier post that BabyCakes had bought a new (second hand) car just before Christmas. What I didn't mention was that it was a 4WD - in fact, if we lived in North America, what BabyCakes bought would be called a "truck". It's big and it's shiney. After some careful consideration, I decided that his all round decency and desire to take his new vehicle actually off road might be enough to outweigh the 4WD factor, and I wouldn't have to break up with him after all. (I've never dated someone with a 4WD, and in the city I resent being surrounded by them. The argument of "I love driving a 4WD, I can see over everything else and get much better sight lines" is an extremely selfish one, and makes my life in a sedan a hellish proposition at times.)
I am very happy to say though, that within a month of having the new Triton in his possession, it has been off road, and BabyCakes and I have had our first real taste of 4WDriving!

BabyCakes bought the "truck" to hold his work samples safely in the back, and not all over the back seat, to not have the joy of an un-lowered, un-skirted car that one does not have to wince at when anyone walks near. It is also his first 4 cylinder car he's ever owned... all be it turbo diesel....


As you can see by the size of his grin, BabyCakes kinda enjoyed it....... a lot! It was good fun, and we had a lovely day with friends.

A group of friends (4 couples, which shall be known as Rastas and Primrose Goddess, Mr and Mrs C and the new Mr and Mrs K) have been talking about going camping together for a few weeks now, there was talk of getting away before everyone went back to work etc. but that didn't happen.
It was decided amongst the group to go up to Bribie Island to have a look around at their camping sites, and generally have a nice day out.

On Saturday we met promptly at whatever time people could get there as close to 8am as possible at the jumbo service centre at Caboolture/Burpengary before we started our convoy to Bribie and all the little stops that needed to be made on the way (checking geocaches, permits, batteries, food, water, air etc.).

We made it to the car park before the access road to the beach at about 9:30 am from memory, and that was where BabyCakes and my adventure and learning curve really started.

The drive down the beach stopping a couple of times on the way to get to know the area and for Rastas to get some GPS way points, was pretty uneventful. We took it slowly, asked our questions and got our answers, were taught some beach driving etiquette and stopped for some morning tea (very important that!).

We then drove to the limit of our access (to the light tower) and once again Rastas took way points and we had fun looking at all the shells and pebbles on the beach.

I have to say at this point that the pebbles and shells were a high point in my day. The simple beauty of them, even the fact that one can still find amazing shells on the beach and the amazing colours we saw were a delightful antidote to a week where one night we turned on the news to have a story on murder, bashings, and a rape all within the first five minutes.

Nature has a special way of grounding me and giving me hope that sometimes I desperately need. It is almost always from simple beauty of light, colour and texture that I find that peace and awe for the world we live in.

Even the fact that there were

creatures in the shells, living in beautiful shiney homes. The pebble that Primrose Goddess found, with natural holes through it was amazing, and we were told it is also supposedly good luck to find such a thing... It certainly was a lucky find to see it.

We then headed off to find a spot to set up for lunch. Rastas had sourced us a magnificent and amazingly easy to erect sun shelter, and BabyCakes unpacked his much loved Weber Q and we had a very civilised BBQ once the wind was blocked from the from the Weber and it was able to be lit.

While the food was cooking Mr K set up his kite, which quickly grabbed Mr C's attention and they had a blast until it unfortunately got caught in a dead tree on the edge of the dune. I think the 20 minutes it took to free it from the tree, and untangle the strings kinda put a dampener on that fun. Rastas set up his high powered binoculars on a tripod so we could have a look at a passing container ship (I saw the caravan on deck first!), and once it had gone from sight, we could get a pretty decent view all the way up the beach to Caloundra, which was pretty cool.

After lunch Mr C could not resist the lure of Rastas' kite which was bigger and fancier than Mr K's kite (so Rastas tells us). There seemed to be a bit more control in this kite and Mr C spent quite some time keeping it in the air on a very very blustery day.

We all got a bit distracted by the kite and/or sitting around digesting our lunch and chatting that by the time we were all packed up and on the way back to bitumen we realised we'd left it a bit late to leave.

The tide was coming in, the beach was getting smaller and the sand we were driving on was quite soft. We followed tracks that someone had left before us, which was both a blessing and a curse. The track was not particularly straight and the ruts were getting huge. BabyCakes found it quite fatiguing on his arms to control the vehicle. When we had loaded up and headed out, we had planned only to stop at the service station to re-inflate tyres as necessary, but I can tell you we were all delighted to see the car park, which seemed to take forever to get to, and upon discovery of an ice-cream van there, we stopped for a celebratory ice cream cone. BabyCakes needed to unwind the tension a bit - not that the tension stopped him grinning from ear to ear.

On the way out we passed someone getting towed out and Rastas stopped to give water to a vehicle that had overheated, certainly not a day to be out and about by oneself.

The drive back to the city gave BabyCakes and me lots of time to chatter about the fun we'd had.

The new "truck" had got dirty, it had been off road and we'd been 4WDriving in probably the safest company we could have.

We had even been invited back to Mr & Mrs K's place to go for a swim in their pool!

The cars were all washed on the way home and we had an encore BBQ at Mr & Mrs K's for dinner. The pool was delightful for the pre-dinner swim, it cooled us down and cleared the grit of sand and sea spray from us. Mr K even helped BabyCakes out by using the high pressure cleaner on the Weber Q, making it almost sparkle (it would have been very sparkly with more de-greaser).

It was not really until we got home, and stretched out in front of the TV and promptly fell asleep during the pay-per-view movie we had ordered that we realised how tired we were. It wasn't until I woke up on Sunday (in bed) that I worked out just how all pervasive the muscular aches were. I'm not sure if they came from the tension of the drive off the beach, the general jostling of the 4WDriving experience, or from some kind of hypersensitivity to all of the above due to pre-menstrual hormones, but my goodness did my body ache - EVERYWHERE!

I'm glad we went on Saturday to give us Sunday to recover, and rediscover the sand that managed to find it's way into everything...


ohhhhhhhhhh..... is there anyone more bitchy than a group of boys discussing their 4WDs?

No flies on us.... ?

On the weekend BabyCakes and I made fly screens....

It doesn't sound that exciting, but being able to keep the cat in and allow a bit of airflow - that's magic! There is also the added bonus that we should be able to expect that flies, mosquitos and bugs should stay outside...

It was satisfying to have a half day project that involved both BabyCakes and myself, that also makes a HUGE difference to our lifestyle. (The fact that it was a reasonably cheap project too also helps!)

Admittedly, it hasn't been 100% successful, yet. At the kitchen window, the cat has worked out a way to use her weight (presumably), to pull the fly screen away from the frame. The first night we discovered this, the second night we shut the window, the third she escaped again, but fortunately I managed to find her and bring her back inside (the neighbourhood is surprisingly quiet at 2am, and the cat surprisingly trusting...).

I think the problem can be solved with putting the screen in upside down from how it was previously installed, and hiding the spline join in a spot that a cat can't leverage easily.

Yesterday, BabyCakes' first day back at work after the Christmas fun, I had fun looking at the Ikea website, and I think I found the dining table I want. BabyCakes prefers this one though, so I guess we'll have to take a trip to Ikea soon (what a shame!). I think the light wood will be a mistake against the wood look floor I plan for the whole flat (that picture seems to indicate that it might though. I just wonder if it might all be too much wood), and the white table also matches a coffee table we both like - it has a display drawer under the glass top.

I have plenty of time to make all those sorts of decisions, not much of it is going to happen any time soon. The bills are making light work of the impressive bank balance I thought I had! Rates and Body Corporate fees have come in again, with Body Corporate finally working out that one bill cycle had been lost, so that doubles the amount due... BabyCakes bought a new (second hand) car before Christmas, and forgot/didn't realise the stamp duty cost when changing over registration, so I helped him out and covered that lump sum till he can afford to pay me back.

My youngest brother and his fiancé announced during their Christmas visit that they are expecting a baby, so their wedding plans have stepped up a notch, and it looks that trip to Perth for a wedding is imminent before the birth of my next niece/nephew.

Babies, babies everywhere!

Yesterday BabyCakes' cousin gave birth to the first child of all his siblings and cousins (who are so close in age and grew up so close to each other they might as well be siblings). There is a new baby boy who weighed in at 8 pounds 10 ounces, and is 50 cms long. He doesn't yet have a name, but proud parents and baby are all happy and doing well. The father of the new baby boy is also BabyCakes' boss just to make everything that little bit more circular!

BabyCakes gave me a bread maker for Christmas, and I can smell that a loaf is almost ready, and, I think that this might be my best one yet - it is looking quite spectacular. It has taking a fair bit of trial and error to get the balance of all the ingredients right (most of my loaves have been on the dense side). I have been making them all from scratch though, no pre-prepared mixes, which is quite satisfying.

This loaf looks like it'll be fantastic for my lunch!

Resolution.....

...to be less wasteful.

This includes:

recycling, even when it takes more time i.e. wash out the cat food tins and recycle them rather than being lazy and tossing them...

only putting the kettle on to boil when I really really plan to make the cup of tea, rather than boiling it twice for one cup....

turning off appliances when I'm not using them....

eating, or freezing leftovers, instead of storing them until they go incredibly manky, and then possibly throwing away the container it has been stored in....

that sort of thing.

I think that with some thought and commitment that none of this is impossible, and is something I should probably do anyway, which makes it ripe for a resolution.

I was among the very few who actually made a resolution at the quite cocktail and BBQ night that BabyCakes and I went to. We had fun, and saw in the New Year exactly how we wanted to. It was good.

Best wishes to everyone that reads, I hope you have had a great Christmas and New Year, and 2007 brings you everything you need.